Some Humourous Quotes from Famous People

We all need a bit of humour in our lives, so here are some quotes from famous people to brighten your day.

1. I have kleptomania, but when it gets bad, I take something for it.  Robert Benchley 
2. As I hurtled through space, one thought kept crossing my mind – every part of this rocket was supplied by the lowest bidder. John Glenn.. 

3. A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing.  Emo Philips.. 
4. Wood burns faster when you have to cut and chop it yourself.  Harrison Ford… 
5. Lawyers believe a person is innocent until proven broke.  Robin Hall.. 
6. America is the only country where a significant proportion of the population believes that professional wrestling is real but the moon landing was faked.   David Letterman.. 
7. If God had intended us to fly he would have made it easier to get to the airport.  Jonathan Winters.. 
8. The first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone.  George Roberts .. 
9. If life were fair, Elvis would still be alive today and all the impersonators would be dead.   Johnny Carson…..

10. After the game, the King and the pawn go into the same box. – Old Italian Proverb

11. Having more money doesn’t make you happier. I have 50 million dollars but I’m just as happy as when I had 48 million….Arnold Schwarzenegger